#23 Hold Still

I had not anticipated this level of aggression. The scratches on the wall paper, the soiled furniture, and the toppled lamps all gave testimony to the intensity of the skirmish. "Dammit, Jonah! Hold still!" I screamed as I struggled to subdue the flailing spider monkey. Why couldn't he understand that I was doing this for his own good? They'd made it look so easy on Animal Planet. As the sense of defeat closed in, I could think of only one thing. What had I done with the receipt for the Home Colon Cleansing Kit?